So 2011 has come to an end and 2012 is now upon us. As is traditional at this time of year I have decided to make a resolution. Making resolutions is not usually my want but seeing as the Mayans have predicted the end of the world this year no one will know if I break it anyway. Therefore my resolution is to promote change within the world of football. Very admirable don’t you think.

But before you all gather around to pat me on the back to wish me the best of luck with my resolution I had better let you know what change I will be actually promoting. I won’t be advocating the overturn of the ban on snoods; the introduction of goal line technology; or even the removal of football’s toady overlord Sepp Blatter. What I want banned are matches played on New Year’s Eve.

So who is with me? Come on, anyone? Surely Sir Alex, surely you are with me? You would probably want a ban on games on birthdays as well wouldn’t you? What about you André? Anyone? What’s that Mehmet - you would support a ban. No offence Mehmet but I need someone with more clout. Don’t worry about it though, that’s football for you.

New Year’s Eve is meant to be about celebrating the end of the year just gone and looking forward to what may happen in the coming year. It’s all about getting together with family and friends, eating good food and having a few drinks (or too many in the case of quite a few people), wondering why people get so excited about fireworks and waiting for Channel Nine’s annual screening of You Can’t Stop The Music post midnight.

But having football matches on New Year’s Eve ruins that whole dynamic and it doesn’t matter what time the game is on. Too early and it interrupts your preparations, too late and it interrupts the festivities especially if it’s a home game. Not only will you be forced to drink low strength beer at the game but also I’m pretty sure those nearest and dearest to you won’t appreciate your extended absence. Plus who wants to wear bright orange or fluorescent yellow out and about after the game.

No matter the outcome of the game you are in no-win situation. If your team wins your fellow party goers will most certainly be annoyed with your added enthusiasm and being a good fan you will obviously extol the virtues of your team’s efforts. But not everyone wants to hear about how Ivan Franjic scored an awesome goal, or how your team finally won a game without their start playmaker, or even how Aston Villa finally managed to score a goal at last. It’s pretty much a conversation killer especially if you are on the lookout for a bit of a snog come the end of the year

Should things be all square at full time I am pretty sure your fellow party goers don’t want to be on the receiving end of a blow-by-blow account of how your team grabbed/conceded/gifted a last minute equaliser. I’m also pretty sure no one on New Year’s Eve wants to know that a nil-all draw is not necessarily boring or that the referee is a dickhead for issuing a red card incorrectly. More than anything they would probably be more interested in you getting them another beer/wine/cigarette or to turn the music up to drown out your incessant chatter.

Probably the worst-case scenario is the unfortunate circumstance when your team loses on New Year’s Eve then everyone suffers. especially if the team you support puts in a performance that is so bad that it is even more horrifying than a screening of Psycho. Your fellow revellers don’t want to know about how your team strung a series of twenty passes around the midfield before somehow putting a cross in that was so off target that the ball boys were worried that they would have to leave the stadium to get the ball. The idea that your team’s performance was so abysmal that you can’t even be self-deprecating about them to your fellow partygoers. Instead it turns you into a mute that is more likely to seen rocking silently back and forth in the corner rather than doing the Melbourne shuffle in the middle of the dance floor. And nobody wants to see that at a NYE party.

So Football Federation Australia do the right thing, ban football on New Year’s Eve. Do it for the good of humanity.