You know, when it comes to pulling a rabbit out of a hat, Sydney have just grabbed an alpaca out of a sky blue beanie (yeah, I know alpacas are from Peru or Bolivia or somewhere and not Brazil, but they’re South American at least, okay?)
On Monday, their season looked like it was in the shithouse. In fact, it had slipped round the shithouse’s U-bend, gone through the city sewers and was floating off towards New Zealand where it was going to have a shit-off with NZ Knights’ record for all-time pisspoor shithouse seasons.
Carney off to Sheffield, Milligan on walkabout in Europe, no marquee, no money in the salary cap, no goals in their last five matches, a defence repeatedly leaking hat-trick defeats and at least one player reputedly on an astronomical salary and unable to provide fans with a single reason to justify it (and virtually no-one to take his place).
Fast forward 48 hours, and suddenly they’ve got Juninho. He may be 34, he may not be a striker, he may not have played a lot of football in the last 12 months, but he’s A World Cup Winning Brazilian. And he’s not Romario. And the World Cup win came in this century...
Milligan’s back too after his 60-hour marathon trip to Metz. Sydney could have disciplined him, fined him and publicly humiliated him – but they actually did the right thing and forgave him. He’ll have learned his lesson from the Metz experience – and the club will keep a vital part of their defence with a player who isn’t bitter about being denied his dream by Sydney.
And although Sydney will miss Carney, the money in the salary cap he’ll free up could be enough to lure a decent left-back/left-winger/striker to sign up (not to mention his transfer fee). Not bad going for a couple of days’ work. All that’s needed now is for Milligan to introduce his agent to David Zdrilic...
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This is a shameless theft from another site, but it’s just so damned good I couldn't resist.
You wanna know how easy it is to be a top international scout? Just go around watching five year olds play until you see one like this. (Although you’ll probably get arrested for that these days...)
Note the speed. Note the skill. Note the determination. Note the innate ability to find the goal and score. Note the date. This was (allegedly) Lionel Messi, aged five. I reckon even I could have marked him down as ‘Has a bit of talent’.
Note also the opposition’s attempts to hack him down even then though...
Enjoy – Lionel Messi, aged five.
Pretty good huh? But anything a five year old Argentinean can do, a nine year old Aussie can do better. Rhain Davis earned a trial with Manchester United on the basis of this Ronaldo-lollipopping performance.
Have a look here...
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The whole Heinze/Tevez thing at Manchester United has the potential to be exceptionally dull in its whole neverendingness if it weren’t for the absolute ridiculousness.
New readers start here: Carlos Tevez can't be sold to Manchester United because no-one seems to know who owns him. West Ham say they do, failed football tycoon Kia Joorabchian claims he does. You might remember West Ham were allowed to stay in the Premiership because they proved to the FA that they DID own him. Except, erm, they apparently don’t. Or maybe they do. Either way, if you were a Sheffield United fan, you might be mildly upset that Tevez’s ownership caused you to be relegated...
Meanwhile Liverpool want to buy Gabriel Heinze for the $17.5 million or so minimum transfer fee stated in his contract with United. Except United won’t sell him – but at least they’re sure they own him. They just won’t sell anyone to Liverpool. Ever. Well, not for 40-odd years anyway since they accidentally flogged some bloke to the Reds in 1962. Or 1964, depending on what history book you’re reading.
So, to recap, United want to buy a player no-one seems to own and want to sell a defender they do own, just not to the only club interested in buying him. And you thought Sydney’s life was complicated these days.
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Former Sheffield United boss Neil Warnock describes Carlos Tevez as "football's equivalent of a murderer out on bail."
On Monday, their season looked like it was in the shithouse. In fact, it had slipped round the shithouse’s U-bend, gone through the city sewers and was floating off towards New Zealand where it was going to have a shit-off with NZ Knights’ record for all-time pisspoor shithouse seasons.
Carney off to Sheffield, Milligan on walkabout in Europe, no marquee, no money in the salary cap, no goals in their last five matches, a defence repeatedly leaking hat-trick defeats and at least one player reputedly on an astronomical salary and unable to provide fans with a single reason to justify it (and virtually no-one to take his place).
Fast forward 48 hours, and suddenly they’ve got Juninho. He may be 34, he may not be a striker, he may not have played a lot of football in the last 12 months, but he’s A World Cup Winning Brazilian. And he’s not Romario. And the World Cup win came in this century...
Milligan’s back too after his 60-hour marathon trip to Metz. Sydney could have disciplined him, fined him and publicly humiliated him – but they actually did the right thing and forgave him. He’ll have learned his lesson from the Metz experience – and the club will keep a vital part of their defence with a player who isn’t bitter about being denied his dream by Sydney.
And although Sydney will miss Carney, the money in the salary cap he’ll free up could be enough to lure a decent left-back/left-winger/striker to sign up (not to mention his transfer fee). Not bad going for a couple of days’ work. All that’s needed now is for Milligan to introduce his agent to David Zdrilic...
++++
This is a shameless theft from another site, but it’s just so damned good I couldn't resist.
You wanna know how easy it is to be a top international scout? Just go around watching five year olds play until you see one like this. (Although you’ll probably get arrested for that these days...)
Note the speed. Note the skill. Note the determination. Note the innate ability to find the goal and score. Note the date. This was (allegedly) Lionel Messi, aged five. I reckon even I could have marked him down as ‘Has a bit of talent’.
Note also the opposition’s attempts to hack him down even then though...
Enjoy – Lionel Messi, aged five.
Pretty good huh? But anything a five year old Argentinean can do, a nine year old Aussie can do better. Rhain Davis earned a trial with Manchester United on the basis of this Ronaldo-lollipopping performance.
Have a look here...
++++
The whole Heinze/Tevez thing at Manchester United has the potential to be exceptionally dull in its whole neverendingness if it weren’t for the absolute ridiculousness.
New readers start here: Carlos Tevez can't be sold to Manchester United because no-one seems to know who owns him. West Ham say they do, failed football tycoon Kia Joorabchian claims he does. You might remember West Ham were allowed to stay in the Premiership because they proved to the FA that they DID own him. Except, erm, they apparently don’t. Or maybe they do. Either way, if you were a Sheffield United fan, you might be mildly upset that Tevez’s ownership caused you to be relegated...
Meanwhile Liverpool want to buy Gabriel Heinze for the $17.5 million or so minimum transfer fee stated in his contract with United. Except United won’t sell him – but at least they’re sure they own him. They just won’t sell anyone to Liverpool. Ever. Well, not for 40-odd years anyway since they accidentally flogged some bloke to the Reds in 1962. Or 1964, depending on what history book you’re reading.
So, to recap, United want to buy a player no-one seems to own and want to sell a defender they do own, just not to the only club interested in buying him. And you thought Sydney’s life was complicated these days.
++++
Former Sheffield United boss Neil Warnock describes Carlos Tevez as "football's equivalent of a murderer out on bail."
