Some day in the not too distant future, Brett Holman will be playing for the Mariners. Holman has expressed a positive view on the A-League and let's face it, he bears all the hallmarks of the typical Mariners player: hardworking, focused and able to score against the odds in the 92nd minute. But most of all, he generates almost hysterical derision from a vocal group of armchair critics.
Yep - he should feel right at home at Bluetongue.
Vincenzo Grella, however, has no intention of ever gracing our national league with his presence. When asked "would you like to play in the A-League?" this week, most of The Socceroos diplomatically answered " yes - a great way to end my career." Vinnie, a man of few words, simply answered "No".
In answer to the question "who should we look out for at The World Cup, apart from Messi and Ronaldo?" he answered "Vinnie Grella".
In light of his performance against the Kiwis, his answer somehow doesn't seem quite so funny. We'll be looking out for him all right, watching and praying that he doesn't make World Cup history by being the first player in South Africa to earn an early shower. Any repeat of his totally unnecessary aggression in Melbourne will surely result in the nightmare I (jokingly) predicted two weeks ago.
While Vinnie has voiced his apologies and Pim has given the team a public tongue-lashing, our performance in the first so-called 'friendly' was a very worrying sign. Coupled with Pim's predictable decision to axe Carle (seen bench-warming at the MCG with the phrase "why did I bother ?" hovering above his head) and the talented McDonald, a cloud of doom and gloom has begun to taint the dreams of many Socceroos fans before we've even kicked our first ball.
Well, like it or not, there's nothing we can do about it. Perhaps it's time to stop arguing in front of the TV and computer screen and just do what fans do best : send masses of love and support to our team, whether our favourites are in the squad or not. If Dr Phil were a football fan, he might advise us to write down the names Carle, McDonald, North (and for me, Griffiths and Ognenovski), kiss them goodbye and throw them on the barbie. Then raise a glass to those who made the cut.
Pim knows what he likes and apparently doesn't mind limiting his choices or rejecting the notion of a back-up plan. He's so confident, he's willing to stake our whole country's hopes on his tried and tested formula. All well and good: his 4-2-3-1 (come hell or high water) will be put to the ultimate test. Come June, we will either be singing his praises or cursing his inflexibility.
But there is more at stake in South Africa than our national pride and our passionate support for the boys. On the line are our World Cup hosting dreams, stakes that are ultimately higher than our team's 2010 performance. The Socceroos are using the time before the tournament to promote our cause, including inviting 10,000 impoverished children from the townships to watch their two friendlies next week.
Let's hope that we show more composure against Denmark and the USA than we did against New Zealand, otherwise the outcome could be as ugly as a pair of Socceroos Crocs (sadly, they do exist). And in our Group games to come, whatever happens, let good sportsmanship (something Australia could be rightly proud of in Germany) be our guiding light. The whole world, and more importantly, FIFA, will be watching every move we make to see whether we are worthy of being awarded football's greatest prize. Better to see us lose gracefully than win with the stain of career-ending injuries to our opponents.
So after so much anticipation, Pim and The Socceroos have finally flown off with the dreams of all of us trailing behind and there is no turning back. It's time we gave ourselves a break from being unpaid assistant coaches and instead threw our collective arms around the team. Yes, even he who must not be named.
Anyone who can seize a last-minute undeserved victory through sheer hard graft is surely of unimaginable value in a World Cup squad. The time may come when even the Germans may join Australian football fans in saying "Ich bin ein Holman". *
*Contrary to popular myth, this does not mean "Holman is a jam doughnut".
