Few things excite me more than an F3 derby. My very first blog more than two years ago began with those words and spoke about the unique thrills only offered once or twice each season when we take on our fiercest rivals. 

If we're really lucky we get to face them in the finals, a prospect so mouth-watering that I get rather delirious just thinking about it. Who will ever forget "The Greatest Mariners Match Ever" ? Or the Grand Final debacle that caused us lasting pain.  Many weeks of each season can be spent merely anticipating the prospect of a derby and discussing the aftermath can go on for years.

This season we were less than happy to find it would be four months before we had the chance to rev up our cherished rivalry once again. That was bad enough, but the news that our apparently insignificant little match had been sidelined due to the Jets upcoming 'glamour' encounter with LA Galaxy left me fuming like a motorist stuck in peak hour traffic on the F3.

Now believe it or not, I have a great fondness for the Jets as we often do for the teams we love to hate.  It's fantastic to see the financial stability brought by Nathan Tinkler and the club's recent generosity to fans is great for the A-League.

But do we really need another visit from one of the world's dullest football teams, especially when it's subsidised to the tune of $200,000 by the NSW government ?  Call me bitter and cynical, but is this actually going to help the Jets or the A-League in the long-term ? Not to mention what $200,000 could do for grassroots football.

Sure, a huge crowd is bound to turn up to see Becks but most of these punters are Who Magazine readers not football fans.  They'll pay for a whiff of 'glamour', spend up big on LA Galaxy merchandise and then disappear back to their blissfully football-free lives. 

Just like they did with Sydney FC.  To paraphrase Sam Pang, these are people who "like big spectacles", they don't like football.  Otherwise we'd be seeing 80,000 people at the SFS every week (not to mention attending genuinely exciting visiting teams like AEK Athens / Rangers).

They are the same rent-a-crowd who turn up once every couple of years to watch the Socceroos but have never been to an A-League match in their lives.  Apparently The Socceroos must be good because some of them play in those 'really famous' teams in England and anyway that nice Tim Cahill is on a Weetbix ad. 

As a football-tragic, it's easy to feel disdain for these half-hearted punters but if the A-League is to expand and grow stronger, these are the very people that need to be courted by whatever means possible.  If it's so-called glamour that attracts them, then give them glamour, either real or created.

The truth is, 'glamour' players like Robbie Fowler and Dwight Yorke attract crowds that are not impressed by the likes of Perez or Flores.  They provide clubs with the opportunity to market themselves to a broader potential audience and generate headlines wherever they go. 

If every A-League team was subsidised to have an ex-EPL player in their squad we may see the A-League glamour-factor increased to new highs.  One player does not necessarily change a team, but getting bums on seats has very little to do with reality and everything to do with public perception.

Some years ago I worked in marketing the performing arts.  At the time, classical music had a very old-fashioned image and was difficult to sell to a younger audience.  Then the attractive young leader of the Australian Chamber Orchestra was photographed in a few cute poses with his violin.  Suddenly, the orchestra's audience increased, swooning women left notes on his car and other serious musicians realised that beautiful packaging did not necessarily detract from their artistic credibility.

Perhaps there's a lesson there for Australian football.  If we need glamour to attract a crowd we can import it at great cost or simply do more with what is already there.  Forget Becks, Fabregas and Ronaldo, the A-League boasts dozens of attractive men just waiting to present their sporting credentials to a potentially huge audience of women -  and what's wrong with that ?

The NRL and AFL market their stars as beefcake and thousands of women (and gay men) vote with their wallets.  Why shouldn't the A-League follow suit ? The A-League could promote its players as a more sophisticated alternative (Thwaite - stop those hand signals !) to the boofy blokes from other codes. 

After careful study I can tell you there's at least one potential calendar hunk in each of the eleven teams - and I'm sure Miron would be more than happy to offer himself as Mr December ("hello ladeez !") 

So let's think about celebrating our own glamour boys and marketing them more effectively. Unlike Becks, most of these guys can do more to excite a crowd than just take their shirts off.

(And give us back our F3 derby or I'll send Marvin round to sort you out).