"The juice of the carrot, the smile of the parrot
A little drop of claret - anything that rocks
Elvis and Scotty, days when I ain't spotty,
Sitting on the potty - curing smallpox"
(Reasons to be Cheerful - Part 3, Ian Dury and the Blockheads)
Polio victim and punk-rock legend Ian Dury penned his famous list of good things in 1979. As usual, he was combining a stubbornly optimistic streak, an incisive mind and a penchant for reminding people - especially whinging poms (of which I am one) - that the commonly expressed view is often self-pitying, doom-saying bullshit.
I understand that the A-League is dead, dying or about to leap off a cliff. Maybe. But then again, maybe not.
It's also possible that the best football league the country has ever known is simply going through the inevitable teething troubles of any new competition entering a crowded marketplace without the necessary resources to drown said marketplace in glossy advertising.
Yes, the league is troubled and crowds are down. Yes, the management is missing opportunities they could leap on (I wrote about some last week). Yes, GCU are in dire straits and may fold. Yes, tweaking is necessary to rein in costs and allow clubs the freedom they require to market their team in their own unique environments. And so on and so on....ad infinitum. I agree that some urgent action is required.
But....
As an Adelaide fan I've never enjoyed my football team so much. I also think that the standard of football across the league is better than ever. So, inspired by the Blockhead who could always crack a grin, here are my reasons to be cheerful in season six.
1. Rini Coolen. Rini inherited a good squad - but that's never a guarantee of success. He's made friends with the players and the media in SA and has the fans buzzing about a new style of play that excites and satisfies.
2. Marcos Flores. Lighting up the league is the man who came completely unheralded from Argentina. He shows just what clever recruiting can do to inspire a team. The fans adore him already. Has single-handedly lifted the Reds game about 15%.
3. Mathew Leckie. Another unknown now being touted as Socceroos material. Another stunning goal on the weekend. More proof that the players are out there if you're smart enough to see them. No second-season blues for Mathew or the fans.
4. Cassio. Back where he belongs and looking the goods. The player who makes fans happy to be at the ground. I am not going to mention his unfair, unnecessary and completely idiotic red card. Won't say a word.
5. Iain Fyfe. Disregarded and despised at Sydney, he has become the mainstay of a very respectable Reds backline. Somehow he's always there when he needs to be.
6. Sergio Van Dijk. Has become the target-man the Reds have long been looking for. Has even started to run and - as the last game showed us - is not averse to a little goal-line comedy. (Very funny Serge!)
7. Adelaide crowds. Not as big as they have been but loyal throughout a terrible last season and building again in the new one. Hindmarsh is a great place to watch football with fellow Reds fans and it's a friendly crowd too.
8. Paul Reid. The real midfield general is back and playing the way we know he can. Another unknown who has lit up the league, softly.
9. Adam Hughes. Denied a goal-of-the-season strike by a parsimonious Brisbane goalpost, Hughes has suddenly leapt from being the man the fans hate to 'most improved'.
10. We still haven't got a front-of-shirt sponsor. That means we could still get someone really exciting, rather than Jim's Plumbing. Not that we're ungrateful to Jim's. Much.
The bizarre thing is that, having found ten reasons to be cheerful, I could keep going. A lot of what you see depends on what you're looking for. I know that some other teams have less to celebrate but - as wooden spooners last year - we Reds fans know how to find gold in holes. Even fool's gold sparkles.
Across the league, players like Perez, Ifill, Bridges, a renewed Sterjovski, Culina, Hernandez and others make games interesting. Fury remain everyone's second team, purely because they just keep trying. The whole competition is made more exciting by the fact that, week in, week out, anyone can beat anyone (except us). An injury or two, a leap in form, a scheduling pile-up and - shazam - everything is upside down again.
There's good and bad in all things at all times. Just maybe we've started to see darkness all around when the sun is about to rise. I'd rather believe that.
In the meantime, I'm going to enjoy every moment of a renewed and dangerous Adelaide United.
C'mon you REDS!