I've noticed the last few months that a new fad has been doing the rounds in AFL and NRL circles. It seems they've all jumped on a new argument as to why football isn't a worthwhile sport and why Australia shouldn't be bidding for the World Cup.
The comment regards the oft spruiked suggestion that football is important because it is the "world game". The response (best delivered by a talkback radio host) is to ask what would be the "world food". The answer of course, is rice. "And what," comes the next question, "do you think of rice?" The requisite answer at this point is that it's boring. And, apparently, thus so to is football.
As juvenile as this argument might seem, I actually have to admit that I find it an appropriate analogy! I don't, of course, support the quasi-logical conclusions drawn by egg-ball types but rather see a deeper truth to be found by further exploring the analogy.
Extending the Analogy
Presumably (and if you intend to call up a talkback radio station about the World Cup you may want to start making notes here), the next point of extending the simile is to identify what foods would represent AFL and NRL. For arguments sake, we could go with a rib fillet steak and a roast lamb for each. They're certainly meatier games with bigger men, harder tackling and more points. Admitting this might be hard for football fans, because certainly now your average Wilson (my new term for the combined forces of AFL and NRL- led by their female media champions Caroline and Rebecca) will be feeling comfortably superior. Of course a sizeable chunk of meat is going to compare favourably to a bowl of boring white rice.
The next thing to do, and this is of course the catch, is to consider the variety of options when it comes to serving up your meal. Just as every football club has its own unique culture within the sport, meals are by their nature variable. Essendon for instance might be represented by having pepper sauce on your steak. St Kilda in comparison might be a steak barely recognisable because an over-thinking Ross Lyon has spent too much time working on his zoned defence to remember to turn off the barbecue. But ultimately, with these foods there's not actually a lot of variety to be had. You can put on a sauce or serve it with a different side-dish but a steak is a steak.
In comparison, think of what the world has done with rice. In Spain you might get seafood paella. In Indonesia your thoughts are instantly turned to nasi goreng. The Japanese might make you sushi. In Italy you will get a white wine risotto. India will serve you up biryani. In southern America you might get gumbo. The list is virtually endless and the variety is undeniable.
Further to this, within a country their specialty dish can be varied just as much as the now starting to look a little less interesting lamb and mint sauce. In Valencia, paella is traditionally made with chicken, rabbit, snails, beans and vegetables. On the Mediterranean coast however these are omitted in favour of various types of seafood. Similarly a Bangladeshi biryani typically made with beef would be culturally unacceptable in predominantly Hindi Kolkata, where historically biryani is made with potatoes due to the large percentage of residents unable to afford large amounts of meat [and being vegetarian for religious reasons - KA]. This difference is very important to the residents of those parts of the world. It characterises them. It helps them identify themselves.
It is this, then, that makes the fact that football is the world game important. Football characterises people all over the world. Just as the Spanish cook rice very differently to the Chinese, so too do they play football differently. Watching these different styles meet on the football field is as much a charm of the game as the game itself. Phil Rothfield or Peter Fitzsimons might not even see or understand it, because they're happy ignoring the rest of the world to think only about Australia and happy to see whether mint sauce or hot English mustard is the favoured sauce of the year to go with lamb. But they're the ones missing out.
Bringing it Back to Perth
Now, since I'm merely a humble Perth Glory blogger and not a public relations representative for the FFA (although if anyone from the World Cup bid team is reading this, feel free to get in contact- I'm available!) it's worth me bringing this issue back to the club. So my question is, "What rice dish do we want to be?"
In the old NSL days, the answer was obvious. We were the gourmet dish on the menu. We were the club everyone else wished they could be. But we're certainly not that anymore- I dare say Victory have taken that title from us. So what are we?
Answering this question is the key to Tony Sage rebuilding the club into an A-League giant rather than an underachieving also-ran. Having purpose by nature gives a club a reason to succeed. Central Coast have the purpose of being a firmly entrenched local delicacy. Melbourne have the purpose of being the biggest and best dish in Australia (although so far they don't seem to go down so well overseas). Gold Coast seem to have the purpose of being the most vile and unpleasant meal in the competition. What are Perth though?
Perhaps other Glory fans have some ideas, but for me Perth have lost sight of even having a philosophy. Unfortunately, without a philosophy our football becomes nothing but a bowl of white rice. And when that happens of course the people of Perth are going to prefer steak.
