"Three billion lives ended that fateful day; the survivors of the nuclear fire called the war Judgment Day. They lived only to face a new nightmare – a world without football."
-- Sarah Connoropolos
Anyone who has ever had the fortune of reading an Australian newspaper would know exactly where to find stories covering the soccer. Unless you lived in Perth for a very brief period, they're about 20 pages in from the back, immediately after the rugby and basketball but just before the adverts for "50 years old and seeking some fun". It's pretty much the way we've always known it - well, certainly anyone of my age. The front of the sport pages are always devoted to AFL, perhaps cricket in the summertime, and the various affairs or sexual assaults connected with either one of those sports. If you happen to live in Perth, you'll be sure to know that Ben Cousins has purchased a house (with or without a chemical lab beneath it) before you know that the Glory have had a stunning victory on the weekend.
The one exception to this of course is if someone has been badly behaved at the soccer. If that's the case - and this tends to happen more over East for some reason - then you'll hear all about it. Flares, fights, financial fixing - it all happens at the football. That hotbed of dodgy characters, vicious fighters armed with flares who at the same time love watching people fall over like complete princesses and pretend to be hurt. What's more, these idiots have pathetic attempts at defending their sport when they call up talkback radio in its defence - and they dare to insult the greatest sport in Australia, AFL! What losers. They should all go back to where they came from.
Let's be clear football fans - we are at war. There are people in this country who do not want us here - and they will not stop until we are all dead. I know for a fact that Andrew "I turned my back on my family's traditional soccer heritage" Demetriou is planning to bring down the game from the inside, using his mole Ben "I sabotaged the World Cup bid" Buckley. He has a network of agents all over the country who light flares and incite riots at Etihad, SFS, and AAMI; and who also attend suburban games and assault young referees. His next step will be to assign all AFL fans a barcode - so that when the rapture comes, he can scan them all to safety whilst the soccer fans amongst us are condemned to a horrible and painful death. We must fight back, fellow fans. We must stop this - before it is too late! ARM YOURSELVES!
Now in case you haven't noticed, that's all complete bullshit.
There is no football war in this country, despite some people trying ever so hard to convince us this is the case. There is simply one company - the Australian Football League - competing against several others; NRL, ARU, and Football Federation Australia. They are all trying to attract people to their business. Sometimes, the tactics they use are morally questionable - but having worked for some large businesses during my career, I can assure you that this phenomena isn't isolated to Australian sport. The relationships these various companies have with others in the media industry, and the positions they occupy in their market, define the sort of public image cultivated for them. The stories written about the strength, toughness, and bravery of AFL players reflects two things - the writer/outlet's relationship with the game, and the populist perception of the sport.
Likewise, the negative image espoused by some outlets over football are linked to the fact that the sport has made itself an easy target. It has never had the money nor seemingly the desire to link up with the big media companies and cultivate a positive image. In the past, it has been more concerned with politicking amongst itself and the higher echelons of football around the world - and let's be fair, after the world cup bid not a lot seems to have changed. Let's also not forget that people do light flares when they're told not to and they do occasionally have a fight and generally treat police with disdain. That's not to say that it doesn't happen elsewhere - it just very conveniently reinforces a stereotype about football.
Two of the football journalists I most respect in Australia, Simon Hill and Michael Lynch, have both often pointed out the disparity between the amount of negative incidents reported at football games and the amount reported at those of other codes. Fair enough, too - the fact that an assault on an umpire at a junior soccer game is reported, but the same action at a junior footy game is not, is a disgrace. I've seen the latter happen personally. But both men also know that this isn't due to some overarching conspiracy against the game - it comes down to money, PR, and our own stupidity.
First, there is the current assumption amongst many fans (and seemingly the FFA) that criticising how the game is run in Australia will somehow kill it. What crap - Hill himself pointed out (in an issue of 442 no less) how important it was for journalists to be able to ask the hard questions of people in charge. Do you think the EPL exists in a vacuum of positive thinking? Of course not! The BBC and co. are often the first to ask just why certain clubs have one set of rules whilst lesser teams seem to have another. People negatively impacted by a choice higher up need to be able to voice their opinion - so that if enough yell out, a mistake can be recognised. Would you let a friend drive their car over your foot without yelling out in alarm- "for the good of your friendship"?
The next thing to remember is that the game has a past image to live up to - or rather, avoid. Whilst the rebranding of Soccer Australia into the FFA might fool some, and the Socceroos success since the move into Asia has certainly provided a higher awareness of the sport, the fact is we did have some pretty shitty moments in our history. There were ugly scenes between Knights fans and the Glory bus. There was (some would argue still is) corruption and "mate's rates" at the highest levels of administration in this country. And we hardly make it easy on ourselves with contentious disciplinary reviews exonerating clear thugs on technicalities, or completely missing blatant dives and play-acting - acceptable in some markets perhaps, but hardly in a country where the other three major football codes pride themselves on physical prowess. The fact our referees aren't professional doesn't exactly help, either.
Finally, the fact is that the amount of money thrown at media outlets by some other codes vastly outweighs football's PR efforts. Historical relationships with journalists, editors, reporters and companies mean that AFL and other sports always would have a head start over us. What's more - and this is especially true of a place like Perth - the papers will print what people want to read. That's why we hear about Ben Cousins and Daniel Kerr's personal exploits, criminal or otherwise, as opposed to why Scott Neville is a better choice at right back than Jamie Coyne. Go look at the websites of the major news outlets and see the most commented stories. After "horse does funny laugh" and "Jennifer Lopez Butt Implants" there will no doubt be a story about AFL or cricket. It is what people want to read, and it is what they want to discuss. Even the soccer section of such sites features AFL fans making derogatory comments, as opposed to heaps of football supporters being glad Liam Miller has signed for Perth Glory.
This, more than anything, is the key point. The shock jocks, the tabloids, the broadsheets - they don't show football because it's not what their audience want to hear or see. If a second paper magically started up in Perth to compete with The West Australian, and it plastered A-League, Glory, and State League over its back pages, it would not outsell The West. In fact, if we are perfectly realistic, it would probably go out of business quite quickly.
I think that in the excitement of the new league, and the euphoria of a couple of World Cups, some people - perhaps even some of our administrators - have lost track of where football sits in this country. I've always found the idea of football being the number one sport in this country, at least in my lifetime, to be a bit far-fetched. Yet some seem to be angry that the sport continues to be marginalised in terms of its coverage. Well, let's face it - we are a marginal sport! We exist during the 'non-AFL, non-NRL' season, we have a relatively small number of teams, many still have wobbly finances, and most didn't even exist less than ten years ago. We need to know our place in the scheme of things!
Yes, there are individuals out there who have a problem with the game; be it a valid one or not. They will from time to time launch bitter attacks on the sport we love, decrying it as weak, corrupt, or whatever takes their fancy on that particular day. But if we then take the time to ring up that shock jock, to buy the paper containing the bitter editorial, to comment on the webpage; we're just keeping the cycle going. It's just another hit, another phone call, another argument to kickstart further discussion on the radio and a chance for the host to bring on Reg, 56, from Bundaberg who will tell us all the faults of the world can be traced to the Jewish Communist Nazi Chinese Poofters that play SOKKAH. But why should we bother fanning the flames? If you really dislike Rebecca Wilson spouting rubbish about football, why do you bother going back for more and justifying her existence?
Yeah, there have been many things that have conspired against us over the years - the fact that nobody really wanted to play the game for a while being one of them - but it's not what our competitors do to harm us that stops football, it's what they do to help themselves that helps them succeed. Take the AFL for instance - players past and present have been charged for taking drugs, for assaulting women, for urinating on restaurant windows. But if anything they seem to come away from these things stronger. "We have a solid policy on drugs, and education programs for new recruits". "We run drug and alcohol awareness programs for youngsters". "We have players go to high schools and talk about respect for women". On top of this, they make their own stories - heritage rounds, indigenous rounds and programs for Aboriginal kids. These are all good news stories that media outlets just lap up. Compare this to the FFA, and they can't even explain coherently what the FFA Cup is, when it will be held, or why Melbourne clubs can't compete in a Victorian version. Don't even get me started on that bloody kangaroo...
There is no war; there's simply a market, and our place is not the leader of it. But that's okay. If we learn from the people who do things the best, if we make friends - not enemies - in the media, and above all else if we do not play up to the stereotypes that a select few have created for us, then we can improve our position. If we just ignore the insults from a few baiting columnists, then we stop the "GAYFL v GAY-LEAGUE" comment arguments that keep their columns ticking over and kill my brain cells and faith in humankind. If we get people involved in the game - and give them a reason to stay involved - then there will be a demand for more coverage. When that happens, expect this supposedly hostile media - enemies of the free world and builders of machines that will destroy all we hold dear - to come bounding up like an eager puppy.
In the meantime - accept that you follow football in a country where it's not everybody's number one sport. Ignore the haters - because haters gonna hate. And for god's sake - nay, for football's sake - try not to do anything stupid the next time you go to a match, eh?
