WATCH: Stormzy and Michael Dapaah team up to face Manchester United stars Lingard and Rashford for FIFA World Tour.

What do you get when you pit grime-rapper Stormzy and actor Michael Dapaah (better known for his comedic, fictional character, Big Shaq) against upcoming Manchester United talents Jesse Lingard and Marcus Rashford in a ‘No Rules’ FIFA 19 match?

Absolute. Madness.

Accordingly, there also seemed to be no rules on-set for the filming of the match, with the video from EA Sports packed full of mistimed confetti explosions, underhanded goalscoring techniques, timeouts called for excessive sweating and capped off with the most unmissable post-match interviews you’ll ever see.  

Just… don’t ask me why Jesse Lingard thought to bring Deep Heat along with him.